To the english and dolphin speaking public

First off, if you saw the BET awards the other night T Pain was wearing a big ass chain wasn't he? Makes it a lot simpler to describe it, eh?

OK, so my parents got divorced like 2 and a half years ago and now they choose to send me to therapy. My mom thinks I'm starting to get depressed so the other afternoon we went to this guy named Mr. Tortellini (wtf why am I seeing a pasta to tell me what's wrong with my life?), tall man, mid 30's brown hair with stray blonde that says he put highlights in years ago and never decided to dye it back to its original color or get them touched up. He was wearing a Hawaii shirt.

So the conversation was like.......

Pasta: So Darkangel14 how do you feel about the divorce?

Darkangel14: Well since it happened 2 AND A HALF YEARS AGO, I'm over it.

Pasta: *Scribbles little notes on pad and makes supposed understanding sounds* hmmmmm. And how do you feel about that?

Darkangel14: About them being divorced or me not caring about them being divorced?

Pasta: The divorce.

Darkangel14: I feel like it's my dad's fault because he didn't give my mother the attention she wanted. (mothers words, she'd be so proud) *blinks multiple times while pasta scribbles on notepad again.*

Pasta: How do you feel about that?

Darkangel14: Is that all you ask? You don't need to have a doctor's degree to repeat what a person says and ask 'how do you feel about that.'

Pasta: *scribbles on pad* Interesting *mumbles to self*

Darkangel14: WTF, What are you righting on that effin pad???? I've barely said anything.

Pasta: *Scribbles more on pad*

Darkangel14: *Snatches pad away from Pasta.* You think I have anger issues and most of my depression is probably a result of my dad leaving???? wtfwtfwtfwtfwtfwtfwtfwtfwtf???? Are you kidding??? My dad didn't leave. My mum said she wanted a divorce and kicked him out you twit.

Pasta: May I please have my pad back?

Darkangel14: Is this suppose to be a picture of a monkey on crack???? When do you have time to doodle???

Pasta: *starts to get agitated * STFU. Just STFU. I have a degree, I went through phycoloblahblahblah school and other important smart people stuff so therefore I am superior *snatches pad back* And I would prefer you to let me do my job and tell you how screwed up you are and how horrible and depressing you and your life are.

Darkangel14: *puts on best therapist face* And how does that make you feeeeel?

Pasta: *throws pad behind his head.* It makes me feel like I went through 7 years of college for nothing.

Darkangel14: *pats Pasta on the back* Poor boiled noodle.

OK so maybe I exaggerated a bit. Mostly he just asked me about my parents, the divorce, how it effected, my friends, etc. And then I left and my mum said I'd be seeing him 2 a week for like a month or something and I'm like 'are you kidding?' and then we went home and had pancakes mini sausages. Breakfast for dinner WOOOOHOOOOO!!!!