Is this legal?

Well before I start off I must say 2 thing. 1 to W. Azam in one of my way earlier kind of slow post I made it very clear that I suck at spelling and tend to make major mistakes soooooooo as I can make fun of your spelling mistakes you cannot point out my mistakes with homonyms. I will let you off the hook now though but you should not make that mistake again. And number 2, I do majorly apologize to everyone for my last post which had many many many more mistakes than usual but that is what happenens when I'm hipped up on sugar. Will never happen again. Also I used the wrong their in my title which are things I only notice when I am sweets sober.

So yesterday when I went to my session with Pasta he was like 'Darkangel14 today we are going to have our session out of the building.' Well I had only seen 2 parts of this building which was the secretary desk where this chick named Tina is always filing her nails or putting on fruit flavored lip glosses. Is it just me or are all secretaries beauty conscious? And the hallway to Pasta's room which is like 12 feet away. So maybe that is 3 and way off topic but it seemed like a good change. But of course I had to give him a hard time about it and said 'is that legal?' And he laughed and said 'you foolish girl, of course it's legal. There's no rule saying you must stay in this building during our sessions. ' So we left the building and went to this weird youth building with about 20 divorcee kids and these 3 adults that looked so out of place I felt bad for them. They were just sitting in a corner reading magazines or looking out at the kids with blank looks on their faces. 'You have got to be kidding me.' He explained to me what this place was. A therapist sending me to a help group what? 'Haven't we been over this. I'm over the divorce.'
Pasta: That's exactly why your here. You're over it but these kids aren't. Most of their parents have just recently gotten divorced. The people here, in simple terms, suck. I figure you can probably help.
Me: (blank stare) You have to be kidding me.
So yes, Pasta made me spend 45 minutes talking to depressed little kids with parental problems. It wasn't the ultimate torture, some kids I actually enjoyed talking to. But others well others just made me a bit suicidal. This one guy was on the barrier of being emo but had that little bit of saneness left in him that you could tell he was happy at one point in his life. He told me about how he use to play baseball and he was good at it too until his parents started fighting and soon after they got divorced. his mom moved out and never called and his dad practically blocked him out completely. So he quit baseball, changed his look and ended up doing drugs for a while. According to him he only just now got clean. Now I see why everyone here was so depressed. I know I was after hearing half of these stories. Who when we got back the the building there were like 10 minutes left and he told me that his boss was saying he has to go back to whateverthatwordisthatmeansnormal (wow I tried to do spell check on this and it said no suggestions) methods so our next session, which was going to be on Friday because I had stuff to do. Uggg great we were going back to Question answer. This should be fun. Also this should have been published yesterday this all happened on Tuesday.

22 days until success

Crazy psycho parents and there sensitivety to my over use of words.

My mother just came in and said I spend to much time on the computer. To much time on the computer you say? No mother I disagree I spend just enough time on the computer not to go clinically insane from your attempts to over mother me all at once and Pasta's attempts to fix my life that's only resulting in my over consumption with desserts which shockingly is making me skinnier not fatter. This should be studied yes?
Mothers stares blankly walks out of the room and returns seconds later holding the phone to out to me saying my father wants to speak with me.
I say 'Hi' and father replies 'Hello awesome daughter who I love dearly even though I moved many miles away and only got you a boom box instead of an mp3 player for your last birthday unlike other divorce parents who usually want to spoil there kids. But getting back on topic your mother called, Speaking very fast and somewhat panicky that you went temporarily insane on her and she told me to tell you to calm down and threatend to send you here but since i am having sports night for the next 4 days that can not happen so I have decided to give you 20 dollars if you prove to your mother that you are not insane and that you have no need to be sent to my house and that I am an amazing father. I say 'ok' go to my mother and explained to her that at that exact moment I was completly stoned but am alright now and that she is a great mother and that father explained to me the errors of my ways so therefore being sent off to him is not needed. She just smiled that she wont have to invest more money in sending me to Pasta everyday and baked me a pie which I ate with Vanilla icecream.
So in the end of this I got 20 dollars, a pie and an old fashion lamp from the guy on the street corner by the gas station YAY!!!!! I apologize for my overuse of words and the fact that most of the stuff was shoved together in long rampages with a lack of punctuation but I do have a life and other stuff to do so I just wanted to do this before I forgot or the buzz from my frootloops && pie wore off.

24 days til success

(May just be able to make it)

The rock climbing story; 400 feet til death.

Well W. Azam, if you didn't read the earlier blogs Pasta isn't his real name, it's Mr. Tortellini which is a type of Pasta. Still strange yes but sensible. With your odd curiosity for Pasta's rock climbing story I was forced to ask him about it yesterday which was really awkward and uncomfortable. I am trying to remember exactly what he said so some things may be a bit off. It went like this.

Darkangel14: Ummm Pasta (Mr. Tortellini) I was wondering if you could tell me about your mountain climbing trip again.
Pasta: (gives me a weird look) Why?
Darkangel14: I just thought that maybe there was some hidden meaning or something that I didn't get out of it the first time.
Pasta: (gives me a look like 'are you insane' and to confirm my suspicions says) Not really but I'll you it again. (takes deep breath) a couple years ago I was going hiking with my family in the rocky mountains.
I had failed geography so I asked,' Where's that?'
Pasta: Its in Colorado. We were visiting some family there and decided to go visit the mountain range. So we were going hiking but the family decided to stay behind this time and I decided to go rock climbing. I was half up the peak when, ( he made this weird snip crack rumple sound) the grappling hook slipped a bit from the rock it was latched onto. A couple rocks fell past me. I tried to climb up faster to get the top before the hook came off completely. A few feet later the hook moved again and I feared that I would never make it to the top. When I was a little more then half way there the hook came off completely and I was free falling thousands of feet. right before i was about to hit the bottom my hook latched on to something and I was hanging about 400 feet above the ground. After that I decided never to go rock climbing.
Darkangel14: Hmmmm
So that's it, Pasta's life threatening rock climbing story. So after my session with pasta we went home and past by the gas station where this guy is always selling something different. Some days it's fish out of his truck or ribs. Other days it's funeral plants and used cars. Today it was living room furniture couches in particular. The kind of old fashion ones you see in movies from the 1900's. I wanted to go look at it but my insane neighbor Mr. W(something Wilson, Withers, Wakefield? I really don't know) was there and I really didn't feel like talking to him about his son Sam he thinks I would be the perfect match for. I've never met Sam and I don't plan on it. Mr W is always mowing his lawn in themed boxers. Last time I saw them they were Teenage mutant ninja turtles. Not my favorite thing to see at 9 o clock in the morning but makes a fun game when I'm insanely bored.
Jessie finally called me last night and apoligized for wating so long. Apparently he was doing family stuff. Is everyone having Family week and I'm just out of the loop? He couldn't talk long and asked me if i wanted to go with him to the movies some time this week and we decided to go out on friday. After I got off the phone mom got all guilty bad mother on me and said that she was spending to much time working and whatever mothers do when there not with their kids and that she's neglected me by letting me spend most of my time with Pasta or on the computer or other stuff. So she was all like 'we're going to go out to dinner tonight so you can tell me all about your life, blah blah blah.' So we went to Red lobster and I was like 'YAY!' And i told her about what I spend my time doing and accidentally told her about Jessie and I went 'uggggg' and she was like 'Oh so when am i going to meet this guy' and again I went 'ugggg' and then we sat in silence for a while enjoying the bread before our food came and I changed the subject to her and she told me about how she met this guy named Rick and how he was soooo great and and i went 'uggg' again because I really didn't need to know about my mother's developing love life. She got the idea and let me buy chocolate cake to-go and everything was right in the world. well at least my world :)

24 days until success

Success count down

Muchos Gracias T.A.T, I don't understand why he cant just say what he means instead of telling me some long complex story with a hidden meaning. Nice to know you like the new layout and the stuff about Jessie really helps.
This weekend I'm going to a basketball game with my dad and one of his coworker, should be fun. I've started a story called Best Enemy about this teenage spy who's undercover and ends up being kidnapped by her best friend who's from the bad spy's and they end up running off together and try to be normal which fails miserably. (Sorry for the lack of punctuation.) Current word count, 2,014 words.
What ever happened to Pasta recently is working cause its like he has a whole new out look on life. Instead of trying to figure out whats wrong with me he's actually trying to make my life better. Yesterday, for some reason past my understanding, he gave me homework. Homework, from my therapist, during the summer? Is it just me or does none of that go together?
I was suppose to, in pasta's exact words, 'do 5 positive things for myself' before my next session which isn't til Monday so..... I have know clue what he expects me to do but I have to try. I have 4 days. Also he's making me do some count down til success or something. I was about to strangle myself when I heard him. And then I was going to strangle him.
I have come up with my first positive thing I'm going to do for myself. I am going to prepare a large banana split and enjoy it. And if I exercise after I can count it as 2. :)

30 days until success

(looks even gheyer on the computer)

The return of Pasta.

So Pasta came back yesterday and the session wasn't totally lame. First he told me to tell him about my week and weekend and then he gave me this laptop with like every song known to man on it and he told me to pick a song for every year of my life and tell him why I choose it which,to me, was a lot of fun. After I had finished and explained all my reasons for the song Pasta pointed out that my music gets more depressing near the divorce the practically emo after but got happier recently. I just strugged at this. To me one did not effect the other. He let it go and told me this story about how he had climbed a mountain in canada 5 years ago and how he had almost fell off and broke his leg. What the point of his story was and why he told it to me I don't know but it was an intersting story none the less. The hour went by super fast and I was kind of sad to go. But then again, I've got him everyday.
PS Jessie hasn't called me since we went to that party. Should I be worried?

Pasta oh Pasta, Where for out thou pasta???

So pasta thinks it's alright to miss out on a whole week of sessions with me. Well since he doesn't know, It's not. I've come accustom to his nosyness and the way he ask way to many questions and never seems to answere mine. According to his secretary (Phycologist need secretarys?)he was doing some family stuff the whole time and he should be back tommorow. So this post will be left without Pasta. *sniff sniff sniff*

You know you want to know

So on Thursday, when I thought he couldn't make it any worse, he did. For the first half an hour he gave me like 15 pieces of paper and told me to draw what I think the most important ppl in my life look like and then I was suppose to write down 5 words that describe them. So for the first 5 I drew my Mom, Dad, My 3 best friends, CJ, Bre && Adrien. For my mum I drew my very off depiction of her and ended up coloring her hair orange instead of brown after running out of that color crayon. I did the same for my dad and friends then wrote a couple random words for each. But for some reason, I may never understand, Pasta was all like 'NO NO NO NO NO!!!! You aren't suppose to draw them as they appear, you are suppose to draw them the way you see them.'
'Well last I checked, my eyes are know different than anyone else's. So how I see them and how they appear should be the same.' He gives me this look like 'Are you freakin kidding with me?' and says in his trying to be calm tone ' I mean you need to draw them in a way that expresses how you feel about them and what you think of them.'
Darkangel14: And which one of your phycology books did you get that from.
Pasta: Uggg will you just do it?!
Darkangel14: Fine Mr. Grumpy pants.
I redrew everyone as whatever animal I saw fit. A big brown bear for mum, A spider monkey for CJ, an owl for Bre, a hawk for Adrien, and after much consideration, A Golden retriever for Dad.
'Much better' remarks Pasta. I glared at him in a way I knew he couldn't see. After he started this word an-something.
Pasta: I want you to say the first thing you think of after every word I say. OK?
Darkangel14: *Nods*
Pasta: Ok, Winter?
Darkangel14: Snow
Pasta: Birthday
Darkangel14: presents
Pasta: Mom
Darkangel14: Overprotective
Pasta: Dad
Darkangel14: Isn't
Pasta: Friends
Darkangel14: Fun
Pasta: Fun
Darkangel14: Shopping
Pasta: Weekend
Darkangel14: Jessie
Crap! That's what I was thinking right after I said it. I was barely paying attention so I blurted it out on accident. Pasta's eyes got large for a second before he asked 'Who's Jessie?' I narrowed my eyes for a second. It seemed like he wasn't telling me something.
Darkangel14: Umm, He's this guy I met at a party.
Pasta: Whats that have to do with the weekend
Darkangel14: I'm going to a party with him this weekend.
Pasta: Interesting.
Interesting!? What does he mean by that? I shouldn't have to discuss my developing love life with my therapist. Luckily the next words out of his mouth were 'Well that's all we have time for today. I'll see you next time.' Which is psychologist (sp?) talk for 'It's been an hour so unless you want to pay more money I will see you tomorrow.'

So speaking of Jessie, last Saturday was when I went to that party with him and of course you wanna hear all about it. You do? I thought so.
So after spending 2 hours trying to find something to wear, I settled on a green and blue halter tub top that ties in the back, with jean Capri's and brown high heel sandals. It was just trying enough but not trying too much.
At 7:45 he drove up in a silver Chrysler Aspen (The last time I went to my dad's all he talked about was cars and it was burned into my brain) then walked up to the door and rung the door bell. What a gentlemen. And lucky for me, mother went to another of her friend's houses.
Darkangel14: Hey *smiles*
Jessie: *smiles back* Hey yourself, is your mom here?
Darkangel14: Nope, we should leave *rushes out of door quickly*
Jessie: *Struggs and walked me to the car and opened the door for me*
So glad I didn't where a dress or skirt. He got into the car and started to drive down the road.
Jessie: You bueatiful.
Darkangel14: *Manages to control self from blushing* Thanks, you don't look that bad yourself.
Jessie: *Smiles*
Darkangel14: Do you mind if I turn the radio on?
Jessie: No go ahead.
It was a touch screen so it was easy to find a station and before long I was listening to Battlefield by Jordin Sparks. It only took about 10 minutes to get to the party. There were more than 60 ppl there and he seemed to know all of them. When we walked in the guy at the door was like 'Jessie! Glad you could make it. Who's your friend?'
Jessie: This is Darkangel14
Guy: Well Darkangel14, Mi casa es su casa, enjoy.
I smiled nodded and followed Jessie deeper into the party. The music was dudding loudly and there were ppl everywhere. It was a lot like the 4th of July party but bigger and the ppl around me weren't old enough to be my grand parents. We finally found a place on the floor where no one was bumping into us and danced so long by the time we were done I thought I would die of exhaust.
Jessie: You wanna go get something to drink?
I nodded and we went into the kitchen.
Darkangel14: So do you go to parties a lot?
Jessie: Not really, just when someone's throwing one. You wanna go outside so we can talk.
Darkangel14: Ok
We went out on the patio and sat in the swinging chair.
Darkangel14: Is it just you and your mom or do you live with your dad too?
Jessie: Actually it's usually just me and my Dad usually but I'm living with my mom for the summer.
Darkangel14: Does your dad live far away.
Jessie: No he lives about 30 minutes from here but he works not far so he's like always in town anyway. What about you? Does your dad live near by?
Darkangel14: He's more like 2 hours away. I usually take a train there when I go.

Much more time and talk later

Jessie: *looks at cell phone* I think it's about time to take you home.
Darkangel14: *Makes sad face* Really
He took me home and walked me to the door. I noticed the lights were on which meant my mom was home and I did not want to give her a chance to embarrass me.
Darkangel14: Thanks for tonight, I hope we can do it again.
Jessie: Yea me too.
He kissed me on the cheek and left.
Well there you go. Thats how my Saturday night went.
And lucky me, monday Pasta was doing some family stuff or whatever so had to cancel are session for yesterday and today. I'm A happy happy girl. :)
Also hope you guys like the new layout.

YEAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

You will never guess who called me!!!!!! No seriously guess...........are you guessing........You know what forget it. I'm just going to tell you. It was Jessie!!!!!! See you. You see my over use in exclamation points? Even they can not represent my enthusiasm so I will represent my excitement with a montage of emoticons. :D :))))))))) :0) =] OK that's all I got for now and as I just saw that suck so...... I'm just going to tell you what happened and hope you can feel my excitement and feel free to come up with your own.
Darkangel14 lays in bed weiring snoopy pajama's watching George Lopez when the phone rings. A questioning look appears on her face because it's 11 o'clock and no one calls at this time. Darkangel14 picks up the phone and in a somewhat tired way says 'hello?' the other line clears their throat
Strangelatenightcaller: Is Darkangel14 there?
Darkangel14: This is she.
SLNC: Oh, *clears throat again* This is Jessie.
Darkangel14: *Bolts up and almost falls off bed but recovers quickly* Jessie?
SLNC also know as Jessie: Yeah, I'm sorry for calling so late. I was going to call at 9 but I was kinda nervous.
Darkangel14: *Thinks 'awww he was nervous' So what's up?
Jessie: A couple friends and I are going to a party this Saturday and I was wondering if you wanted to come. With me.
Darkangel14: A party?
Jessie: Yeah, So do you wanna go?
Darkangel14: *pretends to think about it in order to keep her composer and keep from squealing* Sure.
Jessie: Cool, I'll pick you up at 7.
It always seemed weird to me how someone would either say 'I'll call you later' or 'I'll pick you up at (insert time here)' yet they never ask for you phone number or address. So before I thought about it enough I said 'How did you get my number?'
Jessie: I asked my mom.
Which probably explains how he's going to get my address.
Darkangel14: So is that the only reason you called me?
Jessie: Well no. I really just wanted to talk to you again.
Darkangel14: *COMPOSURE COMPOSURE COMPOSURE* Oh OK what do you wanna talk about?
Jessie: You.
Darkangel14: *Squeals*
Jessie: What was that?
Darkangel14: Mouse, I thought I saw a mouse.
Jessie: Sure.
I could sense him him grinning on the other end of the phone.
Darkangel14: It was!
Jessie: I believe you OK? So tell me more about you.
Darkangel14: What more is there? Besides the divorce and the only childness I'm pretty average. What do you wanna know?
Jessie: I wanna know everything.
Since this conversation went on untill 2 am I'm going to cut it off here. He asked me a question about me I answered, I asked him a question and so on and so on.

Today will be day 4 of my almost all week sessions with Pasta and the last day this week. I made it!!!! WOOOH!!!! I thought I was going to die on Tuesday when he made me cut out pictures from magazines and make a collage (sp?) of every year of my life. And on wendsday when he said the whole hour was going to be about me and h0w he was going to say nothing so I had to practically go on and on about my 5th birthday party and this weird cake incident that resulted in a clown shaped cake being painted all over the room (not pretty at all) and on the other 23 ppl there, I thought I was on the verge of killing myself right there and then but I got through it and after today I will have 3 days to prepare for the horror to come on Monday. Sigh. Don't you feel bad for me? And I didn't even mention how when I got home on Monday I couldn't get Beethoven's 4th or 3rd or whatever rd or th it was out of my head until I listen to the whole Brittney spears album 4 times straight. OK well I guess that's considered mentioning it but I really don't care right now because in 50 hours I'll be in a car with Jessie on my way to a party!!!!!! What am I going to where?!?!?!?!?!?!? OK well I would love to stay and blog but now I have to try on every outfit in my clothes until I find something worthy of being worn to this so special of all occasions. BYE PPL and wish me luck!!!!

IMPORTANT NEWS BULLETTIN!!!

OK so day one of Torture week starts today and I only got a taste of the horror to come Friday on my last day of normalcy. He spent the whole session playing classical music from the 1900's that was suppose to get me in touch with my inner emotions. Since when does listening to dead guys help me find my deeper thoughts and feelings???? Ugg I couldn't wait until it was over.

The 4th of July. The day we spend all night watching fireworks other people let off And your parents drink random concoctions of alcoholic beverages and party at random ppl's houses. This the day we got our Independence from the Brits.
So at like 8 o'clock my mom dragged me out of the house to her friend Lauren's house and the place was so packed that after about 2 minutes I couldn't find her. For some reason she had handed me her wine and it was sitting be side me as I was sat in the kitchen picking the giant chunks of potato out of the potato salad. Suddenly a cute guy came up to me and said in a cute joking way 'what is there some secret poison in the salad part that we should know about?' The fact that anyone thought that mixing eggs, mayonnaise and potatoes would be a good idea is completely insane. I replied sarcastically, 'Yeah but don't tell anyone.' I brought my finger to my lips and made a 'shhhh' sound. He laughed and said 'I hope that champagne's not for you'
Darkangel14: No my mom handed it to me to hold or something. So which drunk parental belongs to you?
Supercuteguy: My mom's name is Teri. She's the fake brunette with blonde roots.
LOL's
Darkangel14: I didn't know Teri had kids.
Supercuteguy: Corection, a kid.
Darkangel14: Always nice to meet another member of the only children club.
SCG: Gotta love it.
Darkangel14: So how old are you?
SCG: 17, (ponders 2 year age diffrents) How old are you?
Darkangel14: 15
SCG: I'm Jessie by the way.
Darkangel14: Darkangel14
We ended up spending the rest of the nights outside watching the fire works and talking about our families, likes and dislikes, friends and other random things. But of course I was too stupid to get his number, and I will probably never see him again. :(

Another thrilling addition of Angel's && Pasta

*Thrilling theme music plays*
Narrator: The lights dim and we find our main characters in a neat room with way to many books on the shelves and diploma's on the wall. Darkangel14 lounges comfortably in one of those therapist chairs. Pasta stairs intently at his magic notebook in a chair way to close to comfy therapist chair. He pulls out large flash cards and Darkangel14 screamed 'Nooooooo!!!!!' in her head.
It was those stupid psychology cards with dark black ink blobs that were clearly mistakes made by 5 year old's that are supposedly suppose to open your mind or something.
Narrator: Pasta held up a blob that was clearly suppose to be a butterfly. Pasta says, 'What do you see?' Darkangel14 stares intently at the card and pretends to think about it. Only then does she say 'I see a parrot.' Pasta looks at the card and then back at Darkangel14 'A parrot?'
'Eh,' she says in her best British accent. 'But you did not let me finish. I see a parrot wearing a ringleaders hat standing on a unicycle juggling.' 'Juggling?' questions Pasta. 'Yes juggling. Why do you feel some need to repeat the lats word I say?' Pasta contemplates this,'Because that's what they teach me at my fancy spancy school.' Darkangel14 blinks multiple times, 'Fancy spancy?' Pasta ignores the comment and holds up another card that strangely reminded her of her 6th grade English teacher Mr. G'oni who refused to let the students call him Mr. G. The prune. 'it looks like a prune.' The rest of the session went on with Pasta holding up random flash cards and Darkangel14 saying they look like something unlike what it resemble. At the end of the session Pasta talked to Darkangel14's mom and she told Darkangel14 that Pasta thinks that she is highly disturbed and may need more help than she is getting. He proposed that they changed it to 4 times a week. The seen closes with Darkanngel14's mouth left agaped.
4 Days of pasta??!! Will I live through it?

Bag lady or homeless stranger? You decided.

OK, so the other day I had to wake up at like 6:30 'cause I had a babysitting job and since my mom had to go to work, and my dad works near the place, I rode with him and it took forever. I was staring out the window thinking 'tree tree tree tree tree tree grass grass grass grass bush bush bush bush bleh' etc. And when I got there it was like I was going to fall out (which I did eventually end up doing) but yeah waking up early=tired Darkangel14 on the verge of death due to lack of sleep. Multiple Z's. And then when he picked me up he charged me 7 DOLLARS just to drive me there and back!!!! WTF. I only get paid so little and he's charging me. Shame on him.
So after I got back home Me and Mom went to McDonald's and there was this crazy middle aged lady sitting in the booth drinking out of a taco bell cup and eating something from KFC. And if that wasn't strange, the chick was slamming on the window saying, 'Where's my ice cream, I ordered ice cream.' The employee's were looking at her wondering if she was going to leave soon, or order something. Then she started playing with this man's kid and you could see that the guy would have preferred her not to but I guess he didn't want to be rude so he let her. Then she went to the bathroom, by herself with nothing, and then came out like 5 minutes later with this huge bag filled with who know what and left mumbling to herself 'I don't want to work here, blah blah blah, job, blahde blah blah. At this point I was like past the level of WTFness so we just left and my mom broke the news to me that it was supposedly my 2nd day of therapy and that since it was 2 hours ago I had to reschedule it for like 5 today which I am not looking forward to. Sigh.
Also my mom's making me come with her to this weird 4th of July party that her friend is throwing so it's like a whole bunch of middle aged ppl getting drunk and telling all their business that know one needs to know. Ugh the horror.